Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Balancing Act

Homeschooling is something that takes up a large amount of my time. I have to admit I am somewhat jealous of my stay-at-home mom friends who have finally sent their last child off to school and now have 'ME' time. That could've been me this year! But realistically, I would have filled that 'ME' time with tons of other stuff related to the kids (PTA, class mom, girl scout leader, etc.). So I ask you, homeschooling or not, HOW DO YOU strike the balance between giving to your family and giving to yourself?

This is seriously NOT a rhetorical question. I would like some feedback on this because I have ALWAYS sucked at this. I've been a SAHM for over 8 years now and I still struggle to strike that balance. What usually happens is I give and I give until I explode. And that's not fair to anyone.

The first words out of my mouth when we decided to homeschool were "BUT I have to get REGULAR 'ME' time if we do this" YEAH RIGHT! However I have no one to blame but myself. My husband is perfectly willing to take the kids so that I can have that time. We have wonderfully supportive Grandparents that live fairly close by that are always willing to babysit. I have ample opportunities to take the time but I rarely do. Why is that?

When faced with the opportunity to have 'ME' time, I usually opt out for a fun family activity like camping, going to a waterpark, or hiking. In the moment, I would rather spend the time and the money on the family, instead of me. However, then I will watch my husband take money and time for himself with ease & I get somewhat resentful. WTF is that?! I could do it too, I just always choose not to.

I have a horrible time spending money on myself, giving to myself or putting myself first. I know it is not just me or other homeschool moms who struggle with this either. I have friends who send their kids to school and fill their days with stuff related to their kids. I know moms of young children not yet school age who do not take time for themselves. Is this a female phenomena?

I know it is in my best interest to take care of me. It is in my family's best interest if I take care of me. It is MY responsibility to take care of me. Knowing that doesn't make it any easier. I know, I know, first world problems! But I'd really like to know.......How do YOU strike that balance?

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